(This has been edited and revised to a PG rating for the general audience.)
"Who really knows?"
"Should I try to settle down?"
"I really should settle down."
"But then I'd be miserable."
"Or would I? I love children. I want a kid."
"Wait, hell no I don't. That would mean no Jack, Evan or Jose for 9 months."
"Well maybe not kids, but I should find a boyfriend."
"But then I can't snog random hotties. And what if I start dating one guy, get serious and then find a guy that I'm even more compatible with?"
"I shouldn't have messed things up with __(insert various names here)__."
"But then I wouldn't have done what I have or gotten where I am now."
"Speaking of....where should I go next? How much longer should I stay here? Can I go back to school next year? Or Germany?"
"Mom and Dad support whatever I choose."
"But they are getting up there in years....and Grandmother's not doing well. And Lena's gonna have the other baby in March. It's hard to support her from so far away. Maybe I should go home...."
"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Screw my life."
"Wish I could just rewind the clock back to the days of lollipops and jellyshoes."
2 comments:
conversation in my head:
what am i doing with my life
should i go to law school
i dont really want to be a lawyer but this pr thing isnt turning out...
but this would only really be the good time to do it...
why cant i get a pr job--is it the worlds way of telling me i shouldnt be in pr or am i just not good a pr
if i dont go to law school now what if down the line ill kick myself of not going
how in hell did --insert name-- get married before me
should i move to where the jobs are
what if mom gets worse
what if mimi and pops gets worse
but then i cant see the cousins
what am i doing
im not happy here what if im happy elsewhere
am i missing out on what im supposed be doing by working at ollys, not going to law school, living in philly
why am i still living at home
who would i live with if i were to move out--no one is around
AHHHHHHHHHHH
this is too hard
so you arent alone...miss you megan
Ing, lollipop days are sometimes highly overrated. And jelly shoes definitely can say bye-bye :-).
But seriously: re "coming home", only do it when and if it's truly where you most want to be.
Otherwise it won't be right for you or for anybody, no matter what is going on. You'll never be sorry for living your dreams.
But do visit. And think of us lots!
SEB
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